


you who melted my heart

by sungjinssoju



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, mentions of The Rose, popular boy brian, soft shy boy jae, typical college au but who cares its cute!, yogurt shop romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:22:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 22,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24629986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sungjinssoju/pseuds/sungjinssoju
Summary: Jae and Brian go to the same university but only met when they started working together at a yogurt store. Brian is the popular and out-going business major while Jae is the quiet and shy PoliScience nerd. Clearly, they're worlds apart, so why do they find themselves drawn to each other every waking minute of their lives?this is really just a cute lil college au coupled with the slowest fckin burn~~~~
Relationships: Kang Younghyun | Young K/Park Jaehyung | Jae
Comments: 13
Kudos: 122





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi everyone!! this is my first fic ever so pls be nice. it also happens to be unedited cos im a lil lazy LOL but i'll get to it soon,,,,,

Jae's alarm goes off for third time in the past five minutes. His eyes twitch, finally showing signs of disturbance from the blaring alarm that fills every inch of his bedroom. Choosing a morning shift for his first day of work might not have been the smartest idea of his, considering how much of a heavy sleeper he is. He slowly begins to open his eyes, letting the sunlight pass through his delicate long lashes. He mentally curses himself for being lazy the night before, choosing to stay bundled up within the warmths of his comforter over getting up and closing his bedroom blinds. Rolling over, he picks up his phone from his nightstand and turns off his alarm.

7.13am. Okay, he's still on time. Jae groggily shuffles out of bed and into his toilet, picks up his toothbrush and begins getting ready for a day filled with social interactions. He can already feel his stomach begin to knot. Great.

By the time he is out of the door, it is 7.28am. Not too bad, he thinks. There is just enough time for him to stop by his usual coffee place and grab a latte before heading to work. Ah, work. The thought of starting his first day makes his palms sweat. This is Jae's first part time job. Yes, he is in his final year of university and he has never had a part time job before. To be honest, he wants so badly to keep it that way. A part time job only means more chances of meeting new people and he is not interested in that at all. He only resorted to applying for a job at this frozen yogurt place because he so desperately wants the new amplifier Fender had just released- Fender Mustang LT25. The moment he laid his eyes on them at the music store he knew he had to get one for himself. After all, his bandmates did complain about how wonky his current amplifier is that it has disrupted their practices as few times. The sound it produces is so crisp and thick, he had to choke back a moan when he first heard it. Picturing how good his red electric guitar would look plugged into that amplifier was enough to make Jae hit the send button on the email titled "Part time job application".

Jae looks up at the sign board sitting above the store front. The big blue "Frozyo" sign stares right back at him. He turns and chucks his now empty coffee cup into the bin next to him and lets out a shaky sigh. Now that both his hands are free, he can feel just how clammy they were. Jae chuckles, beating himself up on the inside for being such a baby and getting all jittery for his first day of work. He rubs both hands against the dusty green sweatshirt he pulled on this morning and fishes out his phone from his back pocket. 

7:56am. I guess there is no turning back now, he mumbles to himself as he pushes against the glass door right beneath the big blue sign.

The first few hours go by pretty smoothly. Jae meets the boss of the store, a cheery young man named Wonpil. Wonpil seems nice, always smiling while talking to Jae. He runs through the basic operating procedures and gives him a tour of the working area. He then gives Jae a short break and tells him to familiarise himself with the menu before the lunch crowd comes. Jae nods and watch Wonpil disappear into the backroom. 

He slumps down into the chair by the cashier and lets out the biggest sigh. It feels as if he has been holding his breathe for the past few hours and is finally able to breathe again. Now that he is alone, his mind is no longer running 100 miles an hour and he allows himself to take in the surroundings. 

The store is just the right size. Small enough to feel like a cozy hangout place, but not too small till one will feel claustrophobic in. The interior is decorated in a very cutesy, family friendly manner. Most of the walls and furnitures are white, except for some splashes of blue from the counter top benches, yogurt dispenser machine and the lights hanging from above. 

The clock on the wall catches his attention and he realises he has about thirty minutes left before the start of lunch crowd. Jae sighs once more before picking up the menu lying next to him and decides to familiarise himself with it while waiting for customers to stroll in. 

Right as the clock hits 12pm, a man pushes the glass door open and enters the store. He has to be about Jae’s age, wearing a plain white shirt with black ripped jeans. He has his backpack slung on one side on his shoulders and is carrying a stack of books in his arms. 

Of course, Jae does not register any of that at this moment as he is too busy panicking, trying to muster up as much courage as he can to greet his first customer. 

“Hi! Welcome to Frozyo. Feel free to take a look at our menu. We have an ongoing promotion as well, 2 medium cups for $9.50.” Jae blurts out. 

The man chuckles, snapping Jae out of his panic mode. Why is he laughing at me? Does he know me? Jae thinks. He looks closer at the man, trying to see if he has ever met him before. Said man has really sharp features. He has a pair of foxy eyes and a jawline so sharp it looks ready to cut everything in its way into half. His wavy hair is jet-black and swept to the side, and he has on the cheekiest grin.

“Sorry…?” Jae manages to stutter out, after coming to the conclusion that no, he has no idea who this man is.

“The promotion is 2 medium cups for $12.50, silly. $9.50 is the price for 2 small cups.” The man replies, his grin never leaving his face. 

Jae blinks. And blinks again, not knowing what is an appropriate reaction when you just got corrected by a customer. Blood rushes to his face as he internally curses himself for acting all smartass and talking about promotions. Why couldn’t he just say hi and shut up?

Just then, he hears the back room door swing open and Wonpil shouts “Brian!!! You are here! Thank you for coming down as soon as possible. Help me watch the store for the next few hours yeah? I really gotta run. I’ll treat you your favourite pasta from across the street next time! You’re the best!” He then shoots a quick smile to Jae and runs out through the glass door, leaving a very dumbfounded Jae with this man, whose name he just learnt was Brian. Fuck.

Jae tilts his head towards the floor, but his eyes peeks up from beneath his bangs and follows Brian as he walks behind the counter and sets his backpack down, along with his stack of books. He takes out an apron from his bag and pulls it over his head, tying it around his waist. Jae continues watching him.

"You must be the new guy." Brian says with a smile, breaking the silence as he fixes his shirt and combs his hands through his dark locks. Jae's head instantly shoots up. 

"oh...um, yes.” He replies as his wide eyes slowly lowers themselves again and continue to trace the tiles on the floor. 

Brian packs his things, taking his wallet and keys out of his pockets and shoving them into his bag. He zips everything up, turns to Jae and says "My name is Brian. Its nice to meet you! I'll teach you a few stuff later on when theres more time. For now, you're cool with the cashier right?"

Jae is caught off guard with this man's friendliness, but nods in response either ways. 

Jae spends the next two hours suppressing his anxiety while collecting payments from his customers. When he was not busy with the cashier, he would observe Brian serve the customers, trying to pick up as much from him as he can. Brian had on the sweetest smile as he interacts with them, genuinely taking the time to explain the menu and recommending the popular flavours and toppings. Jae watches in awe, wondering how someone can be this comfortable speaking with strangers. 

There is finally peace and quiet in the store. The lunch crowd has blown over and its left with just Jae and Brian once again. 

"Here, this is for you." Brian says as he tosses jae a blue piece of cloth. 

Jae catches it in his hands, a look of confusion on his face. 

"Its the store's apron. I saw you didn't have it on so i'm guessing Wonpil forgot to give it to you earlier." 

Ah. Jae smiles in response as a pink blush creeps its way up his cheeks. He immediately puts it on and Brian notices how well the apron hugs Jae’s body as he ties it round his waist.

“You never told me your name.”

“Oh, right. I’m…. I’m Jae.”

"Come here Jae, I'll teach you how to make the yogurt." Brian smiles. 

Brian led Jae to the kitchen area and took out a huge tub from the bottom of the sink. 

"The yogurt we sell is actually freshly made here. So you're gonna need four tubs of yogurt, eight cartons of milk and two packets of yogurt powder. You'll mix everything in this huge tub!" Brian says as he points to where each ingredient is kept. He continues on to explain the process while demonstrating it. Jae nods in silence and hopes he'll be able to retain all these information being thrown at him. 

Brian notices how quiet Jae has been and pauses. He couldn't help but smile to himself at how shy this man seemed. 

"You're an awfully shy guy." Brian states. 

Jae is shocked by the comment, and frankly, quite offended by his honesty. However, he looks up and is met with Brian's cheeky, innocent grin. His annoyance quickly disspates and he ends up cracking a timid smile back. 

"Thats okay. Although theres nothing to be nervous about. I'm like super nice." Brian teases as he picks up the mixer and mixes the ingredients together. 

For the rest of the day, Brian teaches Jae more about the yogurt machine and gives him tips on how to work efficiently. He occasionally pokes fun of Jae here and there to get him to ease up around him. Jae makes it really easy for that to happen considering how clumsy he is. It is only his first day here and he had already broken a bowl. But of course, Brian, being the nice guy he claims he is, promises not to tell Wonpil.

Jae leaves the store that day feeling satisfied. He has conquered his first day at work and it didn't go bad at all. In fact, it was pretty enjoyable. He hopes work will always be as good as today.

******

“Wait…. you’re working with Brian? From Business?” Sungjin almost shouts out. The whole lecture theatre turns to face him as the lecturer shoots him a nasty scowl. He smiles apologetically, but quickly turns his focus back to Jae. 

“Umm… yes? At least that was what he said when I asked him at the store? He studies Business Administration in the same university as us, except he’s in Year 2.” Jae replies nonchalantly.

“He can’t be The Brian right? The Brian Kang?”

Jae squints his eyes at Sungjin. “Who is The Brian Kang???” 

“What do you mean who is The Brian Kang! He’s literally one of the most popular dude in this university. Jae, if you are really working with him, this is big.” Sungjin’s voice begins to raise again, garnering a few annoyed stares from the students in front.

“You realise you’re my only friend in this entire university right?” Jae deadpans. “Anyways, I guess I am? I mean how many Brian Kangs can there be in Year 2 Business right?” Jae shrugs. He clearly doesn’t care about popularity. To him, a small circle of friends is enough. As long as he is able to receive love and support from them, why bother to go out and find more friends? It’s just so tiring, especially when it comes to maintaining those friendships, ugh. He brushes this thought away and turns his focus back to the lecturer in front.

******

Jae trudges on in the direction of the store, his backpack that sits on his shoulder is weighing him down more than it normally does. He had just finished a long day at school and now has to work a closing shift. He sighs, dreading the remaining hours he had left till he could go home.

“Hellloo Mr Jae! Hope you had a fine day at school. Are you ready for another day at work? ” Brian hollers from behind the counter the moment he sees Jae stepping in through the glass doors. Jae is shocked and has to literally take two steps back to steady himself. Okay, he can definitely see how Brian is popular at school. He is so outgoing and likeable, plus, he is attractive. No wonder he has girls swooning over him all the time. Jae chuckles slightly at the thought of that. 

It has been a week and a half since he started working at the store and he is thankfully settling down pretty well. He does not get as nervous as he used to stepping into store now, and he is not so awkward around Brian anymore. He has met the other part timers that work here too, but they are still strangers to him since he had only worked with them for less than 3 hours. For some reason, Brian is always here. Jae has only worked once without him, and he’s not going to lie, it was not a fun shift. He has grown a lot closer to him than he had expected himself to. Of course, he does not consider Brian a close friend yet, but they’re definitely more than acquaintances. Brian has been steady knocking down the walls Jae has put up, getting him to open up more, and Jae doesn’t mind. Brian makes him feel comfortable. At first, he thought that Brian was a typical fuckboy. Happily basking in all the attention he gets when he struts down the halls, letting his ego inflate with every compliment thrown his way. However, it didn’t take Jae very long to realise how wrong he was. Brian is just like any other college kid. In fact, he is better than any other college kid. He is humble, hardworking, and down to earth, and Jae likes that. 

Jae throws his backpack onto the counter and lets out a heavy sigh. 

“Someone isn’t feeling very good.” Brian mocks. 

“Not now Brian." Jae replies. Brian is taken aback but his straightforwardness. He teases Jae all the time and he has never responded in this manner before. He senses that Jae was not his usual self today and loses the smile on his face. 

“Yo… you alright? Is something wrong?” Brian leans in.

“Oh… Im good. It's just school. It's so draining handling projects after projects.” Jae suddenly feels guilty for making Brian worry about him and tries his best to sound casual, brushing the matter off. 

Brian hums in response and goes back to cutting the fruits for the yogurt toppings.

Jae is completely exhausted by the time it was 11pm. He pulls the apron off of him and lets out a loud groan as he feels his body ache. Brian chuckles at him, watching his hair is fall all over his face. He slides a cup of yogurt across the counter to Jae. 

“What’s this?”

“For you. You’ve had a long day. Give yourself a treat. I even put the best topping combination for you. Oreos, mangoes and white chocolate sauce.” Brian says proudly, digging into his own cup of yogurt.

“Oh…” Jae trails off, staring at the cup of yogurt that is now in his hands. 

Brian notices Jae hesitating. “Is something wrong?” 

“Its nothing. Its just that I’m kinda lactose intolerant…. and I’m allergic to mangoes….. and chocolate….”

“Oh my god, I’m sorry, I didn’t kno-“ 

“It’s fine, I’ll still eat it.“

“You don’t have to Jae. I really didn't know I'm sorry for giving it to you I-“

“Brian, it’s fine. I’ll eat it. You think I’m gonna let my allergies stop me from trying out the best topping combination in the world?” Jae smirks back, feeling a spike in his confidence after witnessing The Brian Kang scrambling to find words to apologise for potentially poisoning him. 

They then spend the next hour sitting together at one of the tables, savouring their dessert. The two boys sat in darkness as Jae shares stories of what it was like growing up being allergic to half of the things around him. laughter fills the air. Brian admires how the street lights outside illuminates Jae’s face, accentuating his already perfect facial features. Little did they know, this was only the first of their many after-work-yogurt dates.

*****

Jae groans as he walks along the same corridor again for the fourth time, beads of sweat trickling down his temples. He has spent the last 20 minutes trying to find the admin block in his school, but he is clearly not succeeding. All the corridors and classroom are starting to look so similar it is driving him insane. He stares down at his phone screen, studying the school map for the umpteenth time, letting out yet another sigh of frustration. Even though Jae is in his third year, he has never ever wandered off from his faculty’s block. He doesn’t need to, in fact, since his tutorials and lectures are all held here, and both him and Sungjin are pretty satisfied with the food selection here. Everyday after school, if he isn’t in the school library, which is located right beside his block, he is jamming out at Sungjin’s studio with his bandmates. Therefore, stepping out of the Political Science department is basically entering foreign land for this poor young man.

“Fancy seeing you here.” Jae hears a voice from behind. He whips his head around in annoyance. Who is bothering him now? Can’t they tell he is busy? As his eyes land on the owner of the voice, his gaze softens and is met with a familiar cheeky smile. 

“Brian…. hi.” Jae stutters out a greeting. He knew Brian studies here too, but the thought of actually meeting him in school never crossed his mind. And even though they are friends, they have never met outside of work, which makes this situation awkward to him. 

“What are you up to?” Brian asks, walking closer towards him with his black leather jacket catching Jae’s attention. Who the hell wears a leather jacket to school? 

“I… uh… admin block. Yea. I need to find the admin block.” Jae is spluttering like a fool. He is so nervous in front of Brian all of a sudden and he doesn’t even know why. He has been working with him for the 2 weeks, what is wrong with him? Brian notices Jae’s fluster but choses not to comment on it.

“Admin block? This is the admin block.” He says instead.

“What??” Jae’s confusion makes Brian laugh. “I’ve been walking around here for the past 20 minutes and you’re telling me this is the admin block?? Where are the signboards even at???” Brian thinks it is kinda cute how Jae’s eyebrows will furrow together as he sounds off in frustration, his anger clearly overshadowing his nervousness now.

“Yeah… the signboards were taken down like last month cos they broke. I think they expect everyone to know where the admin block is though.” He chuckles. 

“Whatever. Thanks for your help anyways. I’ll just be dropping some documents off and I’ll be on my way. See you at work tomorrow?” 

“Actually, um, I was justing going to have lunch. Wanna come with?” Brian spoke, only realising what he said after. Now it was his turn to be shy. He doesn’t know what made him ask that question, it was as if his mouth had a mind of its own for those few seconds. 

Jae is taken aback. His mind immediately starts reeling. What should he say? This is going to be their first time hanging out outside of work, will it be awkward? He knows for a fact that if Brian doesn’t initiate any conversation, the meal would be silent as fuck and he is definitely not ready for that. Also, this is The Brian Kang. Does he really want to be seen eating with The Brian Kang on campus? What if people starting talking about him? Or rumours start spreading? Ohmygod…. this is the first time he is going to be eating on campus with someone that is not Sungjin. Jae feels his brain on the verge of exploding. Ah, fuck it. 

“Sounds good. Lemme just drop these papers off real quick.” He says with the sweetest smile, as if his mind didn’t just run a marathon trying to decided the answer to a yes or no question.

The meal wasn’t that bad after all. They went to a nearby fast food place that Brian apparently patrons religiously. So much so that the guy at the counter could even remember his order- 2 Beef Burgers, 1 Cheeseburger and a side of large fries and Cola. This man is a monster when it comes to food. 

The two of them eventually headed back to school and spent the rest of the day studying together at the school library. It is nearing exam season so both of them have quite a lot of work to catch up on. At the library, Jae finally understood what Sungjin meant when he said Brian was popular. Almost every person that walked past their table would wave at him, lecturers included. Some of them even stopped to chat with him for a bit. Thank god Brian knew Jae would feel uncomfortable with strangers around, so he cut his conversations short. When their heads weren’t buried between their textbooks, they were fooling around with each other, doodling on each other notes and challenging each other to fold origamis with their scrape papers. This is not their usual entertainment, but when all you’ve been doing for the past 3 hours is study, everything else just seemed like a good idea. 

As the sun begins to set, both boys go their separate ways. Brian heads back to his dorm on campus and Jae heads home. They leave with the biggest smiles on their face and their hearts filled to the brim. When Brian reaches his dorm, he sends Jae his first ever text message, thanking him for going along with his impromptu plans and choosing to spend the day with him. Jae receives the message on the subway back home and cracks the widest smile, feeling a slight flutter his stomach. 

That day was definitely a turning point for their friendship. It was when everything fell into place for them. It was when Jae knew Brian was safe enough to let into his life, and when Brian knew Jae was too precious to ever let go of. Ever since then, both boys just could not get enough of each other. Their text messages to and fro were never ending, and studying together after school became a routine. It was almost like their little rendezvous, tucked away at the back of the school library. 

As the weeks pass by, both boys grew increasingly attached to each other. Their personalities fit like puzzle pieces, glued together by their shared sense of humor. They also found out recently that they had the same music taste, so when there is no customers in store, they would blast their music out loud through the speakers and jam out to their favourite songs. One of their favourite past time is talking about campus gossip. Since Brian is the popular guy, he pretty much knows about all the rumours flying around and he shares them with Jae. They’ve even exchanged their Instagrams, which is a big thing for Jae since he only has 18 followers. Jae is also in Brian’s Close Friends List on Instagram, which is a big thing as well, since only 36 out of his 13k followers are on that list. The change was gradual, but it was definitely happening. Their lives are starting to intertwine together. 

*****

“Jaaaeee c’mere!” Brian screams. 

“Brian, I’m right here.” Jae says, standing on the opposite end of the counter, unamused.

“Very well. Come, I want to teach you how to swirl the yogurt.” 

Oh no, Jae thinks. Its been almost 3 weeks now since he started working here. He has yet to learn how to serve customers because Wonpil wanted him to be familiar with the back end operations of the store first. He has been very comfortable hiding in the back room, doing preparations and cleaning up while Brian stays out, interacting with their customers. But now, the day has finally come for him to learn how to serve. Jae knew there was no running away from this, so he obediently follows after Brian and walks towards the yogurt dispenser machine. 

Brian picks up a cup and puts it in Jae’s left hand. He grabs Jae’s other hand and places it on the handle of the dispenser, both hands never leaving Jae’s. Jae instantly freezes and feels his blood rush through his body as a result of having this much physical contact with another human. Both of Brian’s hands were grabbing onto the back of Jae’s hands. This sensation is way too unfamiliar to him. He tries to act calm but his palms are already beginning to sweat and he eyes are blinking rapidly. Jae gulps. Brian begins guiding Jae’s hands, pulling down on the handle with one hand and swirling the yogurt with the other. He notices how tensed Jae is halfway through and considers letting go, but that would only make things more awkward. So, he carries on. Brian doesn’t notice, but a pink blush has found its way onto his cheeks. 

“Here you go, your first cup of yogurt.” Brian smiles gently. 

“I could only do it cos you were holding onto my hands.” 

“Well, now you know the motion, you can do it yourself too.” Brian pats his back.

Jae spends the next hour practising his swirls with Brian. Whenever they end up lopsided, the two boys will laugh about it together before Brian takes the failed cup out of Jae’s hands and replaces it with an empty one. Jae is thankful for Brian. He could have left him alone and scroll through his Instagram or reply to the dozens of messages flooding his inbox, but he choses to stay with Jae and guide him throughout the whole process. As a way of thanking him, he swirls a cup of yogurt and tops them off with Brian’s self proclaimed “best topping combination”- oreos, mangoes and white chocolate sauce, for their after-work-yogurt date that day. It was Jae’s first ever complete cup of yogurt that he made himself, and he gave it to Brian. 

Their after-work-yogurt dates have been going on pretty regularly. In fact, every time they did a closing shift together, they would end up sitting at one of the tables till 1am, talking and laughing about literally anything under the sun. As people like to say, it is not what you do, but who you do it with that makes life enjoyable. Jae has learnt a lot about Brian. He learnt about his bestfriend Dowoon, his dreams for his future, his hobbies. Most of the cliche stuff, he has got them down. However, he has also learnt about those not so cliche stuff, such as how he is living alone now away from his parents, or how he is having second thoughts about this business major he is taking. He learnt about Brian’s weird quirks, like how he tends to bite his inner cheek when concentrating and how easily agitated he gets when he can’t seem to get grasp a concept. Of course, knowing all of these just showed Jae that Brian is not the perfect human being that everyone else in campus thinks he is. But to Jae, all of these imperfections just makes Brian even more perfect in his eyes. Him being independent at the age of 22, him being so hardworking in spite of all the uncertainties he habours, him never venting his frustration on Jae, all these are just reasons for Jae to admire Brian. 

Whenever Jae thinks about Brian, he is instantly overwhelmed with emotions. He feels gratitude. He is thankful that the universe was kind enough to bless him with someone like Brian in his life, and he never wants to lose him. He also feels safety. He knows Brian is genuine walking into this friendship with Jae. He would never hurt or betray him, which is why he finally opened up to Brian. 

“How come you never tell me about you?” Brian asked one day as they were taking a break from studying, walking around campus. It was almost evening then. The hallways were pretty empty and the sun was just about to set. He turns to face Jae and immediately notices how the orangey pink skies was a perfect backdrop for him, sunlight falling gently onto his face accentuating his soft delicate features.

“What to you mean?” 

“You never tell me about you. I only know you study PoliScience, like your lattes sweet, like to wear sweatshirts, and all those stuff but, I don’t know you. Like, do you have any siblings? What is your goal in life? Fuck, I don’t even know any of your friends besides Sungjin!”

Jae chuckles lightly, feeling a tad bit guilty for making Brian have to pry for such information about him.

“No. I don’t have siblings.” He takes in a deep breath and pauses before continuing.

“ Actually, its just me and my mum at home cos my dad walked out when I was 4. My goal in life is to be happy. I know it sounds stupid and its not a legit goal but happiness is so important to me. And lastly, my only other friends are my bandmates, Woosung, Dojoon, Hajoon and Jaehyeong. Oh right, I haven't told you yet but I play the guitar in a band in my free time.” Jae lets out. 

Brian is silent for a while but Jae does not take it as a bad sign. He did just dump on him a whole lot of information.

“Being happy is a goal. Who doesn’t want to be happy?” Jae turns to see Brian grinning at him and he can’t help but smile back. 

“Sorry for making you ask, though. I should’ve just told you along the way. I hope you don’t think I don’t trust you, because I do.” Both boys are beaming at each other from ear to ear at this point. Brian snickers at his response before proceeding to ask Jae about this band of his while simultaneously beating him up for not telling him it sooner.

Jae wishes he had trusted Brian right from the start, but he also knew he had too many fears that made it impossible. No, he doesn’t have any traumatic childhood experience that made him develop such trust issues. However, he does find it hard to open up to people. He hates being looked down on and is afraid to share his problems in fear that others might do just that. He seldom shows any form of emotion as he sees that as a sign of vulnerability and often bottles everything up. The only person he is willing to open up to is Sungjin, and even with his bestfriend, there are still some things he holds back. Jae knows that these worries are pretty illogical, but he just can’t seem to get over them. Lucky for him, he is self aware. He knows when things are getting too intense in his mind and is able to control his emotions and thoughts well. 

******

“You’re going to the library again?” Sungjin raises his eyebrows at Jae. 

Jae feels put on the spot and instantly thinks of a lame excuse. “Yea, still got some stuff left to do.”

“Our finals just ended Jae… why don’t you come to the studio with me? Dude your bandmates have been bugging me to get you to go back and practise.” 

Ah shit, band practice. Between juggling his finals, working at the store and of course, spending time with Brian at the library, Jae hardly has any time left for the band. He just can’t help it though. Ever since that day he opened up to Brian, he felt their bond was tighter than ever. They weren’t just normal friends at this point to him, he was someone special and he can’t wait to spend every waking moment with him. Jae sighs. He does feel guilty for abandoning his band for nearly 3 weeks. 

“Okay fine. I’ll head to the studio with you.”

In the car ride with Sungjin, Jae drops a quick text to Brian, telling him about the change of plans. Sungjin glances down at Jae screen and sees the text message. 

“You’re awfully close to him huh.” He says.

“I guess I am. He’s a good friend.” Jae tries to play it cool and stop himself from smiling too widely. He knows he is close to Brian, but somehow when someone points it out, it just makes him feel giddy. 

“Just a friend?” Sungjin teases. Jae’s eyes widden and he whips his head to face him.

“Sungjin! What are you saying! Of course we are just friends.” He is so flustered and Sungjin could see it as clear as day.

“Whatever you say big boy. Anyways, let me meet him. I wanna see exactly whats so special about him that he can steal you away from me.” He smiles knowingly.

Sungjin knew that Brian was definitely not “just a friend” to Jae. Whether Jae himself knew this is still a question though. This isn’t the way Jae would treat a friend and he knew it since he is his friend. He could still remember how long it took for Jae to even tell him his favourite color. Brian was special to Jae, and his suspicion grew even more the moment he saw them interact at the store a few days later. 

Sungjin had insisted on visiting Jae at work that morning, saying how he has never visited him and now he finally has the chance to since finals are over. He steps into the store and the smell of sugar mixed with dairy products instantly hits him. He takes in the interior, the white walls and blue lights hanging from above. 

“I can’t believe you really came down Sungjin.” Jae deadpans from the counter. 

Sungjin chuckles at the boy. “Hey I’m trying to be a supportive friend here. Now serve me.” 

Jae gives Sungjin a cup of yogurt (for free of course) and continues to chat with him over the counter before Brian arrives. Jae’s face instantly lights up seeing the tall male step through the glass doors. 

“You’re here.” Jae says, his voice laced with so much affection that Sungjin almost pukes in his mouth. Brian smiles back with an equally enamoured smile and Sungjin almost loses it there and then. Jae introduces the two of them and they chatted for awhile before customers started to trickle in. Sungjin leaves the store knowing damn well his bestfriend has fallen head over heels for the school’s most popular business major, and lucky for him, the feeling is mutual.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhhh guys I'm back!!! Sorry this update seriously took way longer than expected. Mad respect for all fic writers out there, idk where you guys get the motivation and stamina to complete your fics but this was really EXHAUSTING!! 
> 
> Anyways~ thank you all for waiting. I have uploaded chapter 2 and the last chapter together so that yall wont have to wait for anymore updates hehe. Please excuse any grammatical/formatting errors. It was hard enough for me to finish writing this. If i had to proof read it too idk how long it would take before i finally publish this AHAHAHAHA

It is currently day 1 of his semester break and Jae is making full use of it, sprawling out on his bed like a starfish with his laptop open and his Netflix running. He has had enough of cramming concepts and formulas into his brain while somehow simultaneously purging out five thousand word essays the past few weeks. To be honest, how he even survived this semester is a mystery to him and he is so glad that ordeal is over.

Jae’s phone dings and the screen lights up with a text message.

KingKang: Are u excited to see me at work later? ;)

A smile automatically finds its way across Jae face as he rolls his eyes at the cheekiness of this boy.

Jae: Only as excited as u are

KingKang: Then you’d be glad to know i am suupperrr excited, even my toes are tingling

KingKang: Anyways

KingKang: wanna ask if u r down to have drinks with me Wonpil and Dowoon later today after our closing shift

KingKang: u can invite Sungjin too!

KingKang: Its to celebrate the end of this semester

Jae stares at the string of text messages he just received. He knew Wonpil, of course, since he is his boss, but he isn’t that familiar with Dowoon. He has met him a few times when he visited the store to see Brian but their interactions were pretty surface level. He knew he was Brian’s best friend, since Brian had told him countless of stories about them. They were almost like brothers, actually. They had been friends for as long as he can remember, went to preschool, high school, and now university together. He was practically Brian’s ride or die. Jae sighs. He knew Brian wanted him to come along. “I guess it won’t be that bad? I know everyone except Dowoon, and I can call Sungjin too…” Jae weighs his options in his head.

Jae: Sure. I’ll text Sungjin

KingKang: SWEETTT!!! It’ll be at Wonpil’s house. We can go there tgt after work but I’ll text u the address to forward to Sungjin

The address was sent to Jae within the next few seconds and he forwards it to Sungjin before clicking his phone off. He glances at his wall clock and saw that it was almost time for him to get ready for work. He shuts his laptop, opens Spotify on his phone and plays his go to playlist before he reluctantly peels his body off of his bed and goes to wash up.

“I’m so glad you could join us!!!” Wonpil says to Jae the moment he opens the door. Plastered on his face was the brightest smile Jae has ever seen in his life. Jae nods shyly and greets him back. He tenses up the moment he saw Dowoon walking towards them from behind. Brian notices him stiffening up and places a hand on his back, rubbing up and down comfortingly while lifting up his other hand to engulf Dowoon in the biggest hug.

Once they have all exchanged their greetings, Wonpil leads them into the living room where a cozy couch is placed in front of the TV, and a small coffee table sits in between. Jae glances down on the coffee table and sees a pair of remote control and two opened beer cans.

“Ah, We kinda started before you came, hope you don’t mind. We’re playing some video games. Wanna play?” Dowoon says.

“MARIO KART!!!! LETS PLAY MARIO KART!!! C’MERE DOWOON PULL IT UP FOR ME!” Brian shouts in excitement as he runs from Jae’s side and plonks himself down on the couch.

“Yea okay but thats my spot you idiot.” Dowoon deadpans and smacks Brian’s arm. Jae chuckles a little watching the two boys interact and takes a seat next to Brian. He feels himself already loosening up a little as he watches them squabble while struggling to load up Mario Kart. Wonpil comes over and hands him a can of beer, which he gladly accepts, hoping the alcohol could calm him down even more.

A few games of Mario Kart and a can of beer later, Sungjin is knocking on Wonpil’s door.

“Sorry for being late. I’m not familiar with this neighbourhood. I bought us some snacks though.” He says shyly. Jae feels his shoulders drop and he lets out a breath at the sight of his best friend. He was finally here. Jae quickly walks to Sungjin and guides him to the sofa he has been sitting on. He really needed his best friend with him to be able to fully relax. The game of Mario Kart resumes and they take turns with the controller, competing against each other to find who was the best at it.

Sungjin ultimately emerges victorious. He proudly sets the controller down as he gives a fake thank you speech, getting up from the sofa and bowing to his non existent audience. The rest of the boys are cracking up and rolling around the floor at his performance, a little too tipsy to control their laughters. The awkward tension that once loomed over the boys has vanished without a trace. It seems like screaming and cursing at each other over a racing game really helps to break the ice. Wonpil gets up and takes another carton of beer out of the chiller once their laughing fit has died down, handing it out to the boys.

“Wait, Dowoon, how’d know Wonpil?” Jae starts.

“Oh, I used to visit Brian at work so much Wonpil just recognised me after awhile.”

“Ahhh…” Jae nods slowly.

“What about you? How’d you meet Sungjin?”

“I was paired with him for one of our first few projects in year 1. Not gonna lie I kinda hated him at first because he was so bossy. Now that I think about it though, he just knew what he wanted and went for it.” Jae replies. Sungjin’s eyes widen and he smacks his arm.

“What do you mean bossy! Jae you better watch your mouth I’m your only friend in uni.” Sungjin jokes and once again, the rest of the boys throw their heads back in laughter. The five boys continue chatting well into the night, bonding over stupid jokes and alcohol.

Before they know it, the clock hits 3am. The energy level in the room has significantly plummeted and the alcohol is slowly taking over the boys’ system. All their faces are flushed red and their sentences are starting to get slurry.

“Wahhhh you guys are such a fun bunch! So glad we came together. Thank you Jae and Brian~” Dowoon comments all of a sudden. The boys all murmur in agreement, too tired to form cohesive sentences.

“You’re right. I’m so thankful I met Jae.” Brian suddenly says softly as he turns to look at Jae. He stretches out his hands to cup the side of Jae’s face and brushes his thumbs against his flushed red cheeks, smiling fondly. Jae only melts into his touch, too intoxicated to register what is going on. The rest of the boys froze as they watch silently, eyes darting across the room to look at each other, too stunned any other sort of reaction. They only turn away and pretend they didn’t notice when Brian’s hand finally falls from Jae’s face.

Not long later, the boys are all calling their own cabs home, opting to head home now before they’re completed knocked out.

The next day, Jae wakes up way past noon with a pounding headache. Ugh, fuck hangovers. Thank god he doesn’t have a shift today, but Brian does, though. There his mind goes again, wandering towards Brian as if its second nature. He picks up his phone wanting to send him a quick good morning (or afternoon) text, only to see he had beat him to it.

KingKang: Rise and shine~ hope ur hangover is manageable :)

Jae: I’ll be fine, its not like I have anything to do today anyways

Jae: How r u tho? heard ure on morning shift lol

KingKang: wow jae, ure such an early riser!

KingKang: anws, im all good,,, all the parties i’ve been to has trained me well for this

Jae chuckles at his text, but still can’t help but worry for him. He hopes Brian’s hangover are be bearable. It is bad enough he has to deal with snobby customers at work, he doesn’t want him to struggle with a throbbing headache as well. He sighs and throws his phone by his side before crawling out of bed to wash up. As he brushes his teeth, his mind takes him back to the night before. He remembers how Wonpil and Dowoon were really sweet and welcoming towards him and Sungjin, and that really warms his heart. He had thoroughly enjoyed hanging out with all the boys yesterday. He mentally pats himself on the back for agreeing to step out of his comfort zone and do some social interaction. Maybe sometimes making new friends just isn’t so bad after all, he thinks.

Ever since then, all five boys started hanging out together more often, going for dinners or playing friendly soccer matches almost once a week.

*****

Jae and Brian are currently 4 weeks into semester break and they have spent practically every other day together. If they weren’t seeing each other at work, they were hanging out at arcades, going to the theatres to rewatch the same few films, or simply crashing each other’s places to chill. Most of their activities were pretty meaningless, but it doesn’t matter because all they wanted was to spend time together. The two boys found themselves running out of things to do pretty quickly after having done almost every single activity possible in this neighbourhood. One time, they were so bored they decided to do that cliche thing where you would get onto whichever train that arrives first and let it take you wherever it goes. They ended up sitting on that train for 4 hours, too engrossed in each other to even realise time was passing. The first hour was spent listening to music on Jae’s airpods, which led to their never ending argument on which musician has the most flawless discography. When they got tired of that, they started talking about their future and the stress that comes with adulting, as if they had not touched on that topic a thousand times before. Somehow in the midst of spilling out their deepest fears to each other, the topic gets changed once again and they’re debating if cookies are meant to be crunchy or chewy. This is what Brian loves most about his friendship with Jae. They could talk about literally anything and he could be 100% himself, in all his sarcastic and corny glory, knowing Jae wouldn’t even bat an eye. He has never felt more true to himself, and no one has ever made him feel more comfortable, than he is when he’s with Jae. He didn’t even know it was possible then, but he had gotten even more attached to Jae than he already was before semester break. From their playful banters to their cheap midnight thrills to simply lying on the bed with their eyes tracing the cracks on his ceiling in silence, he has found millions other reasons to cherish Jae.

Brian hears a ding from his phone on his dresser table. He removes his hands from his hair and wipes the excess hair wax onto his jeans before picking up his phone.

Jae: same place?

KingKang: yep.

Jae: cool, see u in 15mins.

KingKang: ok cupcake, will order for u first.

He giggles at the cringey pet name he teased Jae with as he puts his phone in his pocket and heads out the door, walking towards the fast food chain he introduced Jae on the day of their impromptu hangout. They had frequent the place so often ever since then that the workers now have Jae’s order memorised on top of Brian’s order.

Brian is on the way to meet Jae for lunch before heading to Sungjin’s studio to sit in on one of Jae’s band’s practice. He has been begging Jae for the longest time to sing and play the guitar for him but Jae has always said no. A small part of him was shy, but for the most part, he was just doing it to tease Brian. Finally though, after weeks of persuasion, they had come to a compromise. Brian was allowed to sit in on one practice, but he is not allowed to speak during the practice or talk about it after. He cannot comment on how good or bad a set was, or mention Jae’s singing. He basically has to act as if he was never there at practice. It sounds ridiculous, but Brian is not complaining since he is getting what he wanted.

“Why does Sungjin have a studio again?” Brian says with a mouth full of burger.

Jae rolls his eyes playfully. “Bri we’ve been through this. Sungjin doesn’t own the studio, it belongs to his dad. His dad owns a music school so he lets Sungjin use one of the rooms, and Sungjin lets us use it for band practice because he’s nice.”

“I knew that.”

“Sure you do.” Their eyes meet with a playful smirk before they each look back down at their burgers in hand.

At the studio, Brian meets Jae’s bandmates. They were all pretty chill, although they honestly did not look like the type of friends Jae would have. Jae is quiet and reserved but these boys were loud and rowdy. The moment Brian stepped into the studio, one of the guys, whose name he learnt later was Woosung, immediately exclaimed “Boys we have a guest!”. This sent the rest of the members scurrying to the door to see who he was. Brian was about to question how the hell Jae would fit into this when he realised that they themselves were quite a mismatch too. Him being the popular kid and Jae being the kid that hides at the back of the class and could easily slip away without anyone noticing. He insides flutter at the thought of him finding Jae despite the odds. A warm feeling bubbles inside his chest and makes him blush, but he was was quick to shove it aside and choses to focus on the boys in front of him instead.

Practice lasted for about 3 hours before they decided to call it a day, seeing how everyone was slowly getting restless. The boys decided to hang out at the studio for the next few hours talking crap and getting to know each other. Brian took the opportunity to try out all the different instruments and show off his guitar skills he picked up when he was in high school. It wasn’t too bad, honestly, but it was also nowhere near Jae.

When they finally stepped out of the studio, the sun was already setting. Jae and Brian bid farewell to Jae’s bandmates as they headed home and it is left with just the two of them once again, standing at the entrance of the building.

“So…”

“Ah ah ah no, remember the deal. No talking about practice.” Jae holds up a finger to stop Brian from continuing.

“What? no, I was going to say your BANDMATES were cool.”

Jae pauses to think.

“Okay thats fine. And yeah, they are. They’re hella talented too.” Jae shrugs.

“How’d yall meet?” Brian asks as they begin walking to no where in particular.

“Through Sungjin. They were taking music classes here for awhile and since Sungjin comes here often to help his dad, they kinda just became friends. I got introduced to the mix because they wanted to form a band and Sungjin knew I could play the guitar.”

“Hmmm cool…” Brian trails off. He has so many more questions popping up in his head but he knows he can’t ask them because of the stupid deal. He’d just have to ask them months later when Jae forgets about it.

“Takeaway dinner to my place or yours?” He switches the subject upon hearing his stomach grumble.

“Yours.”

They settled on Macdonald’s and watching Friends on Brian’s laptop for tonight’s activity. Jae had insisted on enjoying the greasy goodness one last time before he goes on a food ban to preserve his throat for a gig he has the next weekend. Brian reluctantly agreed despite supposedly being on a diet. As Jae said, “You got your whole life to go on a diet, but you only got one shot to nail a gig”.

“I still don’t get why it took me a whole month before you let me watch you practise in the studio, but you’re so eager for me to watch you on your gig.” Brian states while taking the food out of the bag.

“Everything you do is just cooler when you’re on stage.” Jae shrugs in response with a cheeky grin.

Both boys sat in silence the next few hours, chomping down an ungodly amount of fries with their eyes glued to the screen. They were only snapped back into reality when a loud thunder claps through the skies. Their heads whip towards the window and they see streaks of silver splitting across the night sky as raindrops violently splatter on the sidewalks.

“Ah shucks. You gotta lend me your umbrella Bri, I didn’t bring mine today.” Jae says turning his head back to face Brian.

“Um… I don’t own an umbrella though.” Brian sheepishly admits.

“Huh??! How?”

“I don’t know!!! I always just make it run for it.” He shrugs in response. Brian watches Jae as he slumps in defeat into his bed. He knows Jae has another band practice tomorrow so he needs to get home soon in order to get ample rest. He instantly feels guilty for not owning an umbrella even though it isn’t really his fault. He internally debates if he should offer Jae to stay the night in his dorm since the walk to the bus stop is quite a distance, and Jae’s weak ass immune system would definitely not survive running under the rain for anything more than a minute. Brian is unsure. Sure they have crashed at each other place multiple times, but never once did they stay over. Although there isn’t much of a difference, this is still uncharted territory for them and Brian feels a little nervous about extending the invitation. His heart aches thinking about leaving Jae to run in the rain, though, and immediately makes a decision.

“How about you just stay here for the night?” Brian barely manages to squeak out. He tries to act nonchalant about it but his palms are sweating. God, why is he nervous? It’s literally just a sleepover. He watches Jae intently as his brows furrow together, thinking about Brian’s proposition.

“Hmm, I guess I could.” He finally says casually, making Brian feel like a fool for being anxious. What Brian doesn’t know though, is that Jae was feeling equally jittery about this. His heart was pumping hard against his chest and his eyes were blinking rapidly. Jae swallows and adjusts himself on the bed before speaking again.

“You gotta lend me some of your clothes though.” He immediately regrets saying that the moment he looks over and sees Brian’s evil grin.

“NO! Brian Kang you will NOT be picking what i wear!! I’m taking the clothes myself.” Jae shouts and literally leaps out of bed, shoves Brian aside and runs over to the closet. He immediately zooms in on the navy hoodie he has seen Brian wear multiple times and snatches it off the hanger.

“Nooo not that hoodie it’s my favourite, I was gonna wear it tomorrow.” Brian pouts when he peeks over Jae’s shoulder to see what he picked out. Jae just giggles in response, but also because he was getting shy thinking about wearing Brian’s hoodie.

“Maybe if you had an umbrella I wouldn’t need to be borrowing clothes from you in the first place bri.” Jae cockily teases back and watch his friend let out an exasperated sigh. Just like that, both boys had forgotten about the apprehensiveness they felt a few seconds ago.

Brian struggles to fall asleep that night. Not because of the soft snores escaping Jae’s lip, but because Jae is sleeping on the same puny bed right next to Brian. His bed was not meant to fit two boys, which is why Brian has Jae completely pressed up against his side, making him so flustered he can barely focus on falling asleep. Brian doesn’t really bother to give it much thought and brushes it aside, chosing to use all his energy to will himself to sleep instead. He simply boils it down to it being their first sleepover. Although, he seems to be forgetting how Dowoon would sleepover countless of times in the past too and he has never once reacted this way.

The next morning, Brian wakes up to an empty dorm room. He immediately checks his phone to see if Jae had left his any messages and true enough, he did.

Jae: wassap kang

Jae: thanks for letting me stay the night!!! i slept rlly well, i hope i didnt snore hahaha

Jae: anyways

Jae: i’ve headed to the studio early to do some work by myself, got a whole day practise ahead.

Brian smiles at the slight domesticity of the situation and types in a response.

KingKang: oh u definitely snored…..

KingKang: alright, have fun with the band and i’ll text u again later

KingKang: DONT DIRTY MY FAV HOODIE >:((( i want it back asap, mr park

Brian’s heart flutters a little thinking about how the hoodie will have Jae’s scent on it by the end of today. He feels a literal zoo somersaulting around his stomach as he crawls out of bed, getting ready to go to work.

“Who is thaaat~” Wonpil says in a singsong voice. Brian snaps his head around as he tries to hide the smile on his face. It is past noon and Brian is almost done with his shift.

“Wahh…. smile any wider and your face might split in two,” Wonpil teases. “Who are you texting!!” Wonpil has bounced his way in front of Brian, blocking his way as he whines for an answer.

Brian clicks his phone off and shoves it into his back pocket, waving Wonpil away. “Its just Jae.”

“Oohh, you guys are really close I see…” Wonpil teasingly trails off, not letting Brian get past him. Brian widens his eyes swats Wonpil’s arm.

“Its nothing!! We were just catching up, thats all!!” He says and tries to shove past Wonpil to exit the back room of the store.

“Catching up from what Brian? You guys practically see each other everyday. Dowoon is so bored he literally started hitting me up.” Wonpil laughs.

Brian’s face flushes red, but his smile from earlier never left his face. He feels guilty for neglecting Dowoon and makes a mental note to text him after this.

“Wonpil i swear! Jae is just a good friend. Ugh whatever! My shift has ended I’m going home.” Brian huffs out as he grabs his bag and squeezes past Wonpil’s arms. His face is still burning when he leaves the store. He doesn’t know why, but he feels so exposed. He doesn’t like Jae, theres no way. Jae is just a friend. Sure, Jae is special to him, makes him happy and he loves spending time with him, but that is about it. Their relationship is completely platonic, he reassures himself. He sighs and tries to shake the unsettled feeling he has in his chest as he steps into subway station.

Two more stops before Brian reaches his destination, someone from the next carriage catches his eye. It was a tall male, blonde hair with a cap on, bundled up in a yellow sweatshirt. Brian squints his eyes and leaned in for a closer look, making sure this isn’t his eyes playing tricks on him. His face immediately lights up when his eyes land on those familiar pair of sneakers Jae always has on no matter where he goes. It was indeed Jae. Brian feels all the energy that left his body get re-absorbed back in. He picks his bag off the floor, ready to surprise his friend when he notices a girl beside him and immediately halts in his tracks. This girl has long black hair, is significantly shorter than him, and is looking up at Jae with eyes filled with adoration. Jae has his arms around her shoulder and she was leaning into him, way too comfortable for Brian’s liking. Brian laughs to himself. Who is she? Brian doesn’t recall Jae mentioning him having any female friends, let alone one he is close enough with to be all snuggled up in a train with. He rolls his eyes and looks away from them, trying to make sense of this new information. He tries not be bothered but something just doesn’t sit right with him. When he looks back at them, he sees Jae leaning down and planting a kiss on the girl’s lips. Brian’s jaw drops and his body freezes. What? Jae has a girlfriend? Since when? Why hasn’t he told me before? What is he even doing here, he told me he had practice the whole day? Is he hiding this on purpose? Brian’s mind is reeling and thousands of questions are flying around his mind. Anger fills him up and he feels like he is about to puke. Brian grabs his bag and rushes out of the train when the doors open even though this isn’t his stop. He couldn’t stay inside any longer, not when his friend is in there smooching his secret girlfriend.

Brian finds himself sitting on a bench by the platform, staring into space. Almost an hour has passed since he saw Jae and his girlfriend. His fatigue from working all morning has magically vanished and the only thought occupying his mind now is Jae and his secret girlfriend. Although he has cooled down from the the initial shock and anger, thousands of emotions are still bubbling inside him, making him want to throw up. He isn’t able to pinpoint what is making him so uneasy, though. He knows he is not happy with this, but he is definitely not angry. He could understand why Jae would’ve wanted to keep it a secret, considering how much of a private person he is. But if he could understand this much, then why does his insides turn inside out every time his brain plays back the scene of Jae kissing his girlfriend? He tries his best to wrap his head around this and comprehend his emotions but he isn’t doing very well. Something in him is desperately pushing out the idea that Jae has a girlfriend. Brian hides his face in his hands and lets out a frustrated sigh for the tenth time. He grabs his bag and finally gets up from his spot to board the incoming train. Today is not his day. His only wish now is to be able to go back to his dorm as soon as possible and sleep away this nasty feeling.

Morning comes and Brian is lying on his bed with his eyes wide open. Yesterday was painful. After coming back from work, he immediately dove head first into his sheets and thankfully passed out right away. However, he had woken up at 3am and lo and behold, the image of Jae and his girlfriend was the first thing that came into his mind. Brian had been lying awake since, with what he saw in the train practically on loop in his head. It doesn’t help that his pillowcase still has Jae’s scent from yesterday. He is so frustrated at this point he just wants to punch something. Why does this news consuming him? This isn’t his first friend to get attached. Dowoon has had multiple partners before and Brian has never once felt this way. Sometimes he is even grateful for Dowoon’s partners because there would just be less Dowoon to handle, if that makes sense. He also wasn’t angry that Jae chose to hide it from him, so why is this haunting him? Was he jealous that Jae is attached and he isn’t? Brian chuckles to himself the moment that thought came into his mind. He really is going insane. He decides that that was enough spiralling for one day and finally gets out of bed to wash up. He takes a shower and changes out yesterday’s clothes before calling Dowoon. If he plans to get through today without losing his mind he needs a distraction.

The next few days go by and Brian doesn’t text Jae. He is trying to avoid Jae as best as he can and even requested Wonpil to pull him out of any shifts he has for the next week, lying to him that he has family issues to attend to. He is still in the midst of getting his thoughts and emotions in order and doesn’t want to vent his frustration on Jae. Plus, he won’t know how to act in front of him now anyways. Jae surprisingly doesn’t text first either, but Brian just assumes it is because he is busy practicing for the gig his band has this coming weekend.

Jae is seated in the cafe with Sungjin, staring at his phone for the third time the past minute.

“Jae why don’t you just text him first? I can’t bear to see you wait by your phone any longer.” Sungjin says slightly sympathetically.

“What? No it’s fine I’m not that bothered. How’s your food?” Jae says, trying to divert the topic.

“C’mon Jae, just drop him a text, ask him how he has been or whatever. Its not like you guys are fighting or anything.”

Jae sighs. When Brian didn’t respond to his good morning text the day after the sleepover, he didn’t think much of it, assuming it had just slipped his mind to text him back, so he waited. Unfortunately, hours turned to days and now here they are, 4 days later with still no response from Brian. Jae considered double texting so many times, but he thought there must be a reason Brian needed space, so he chose to wait. He eventually went to ask Dowoon and Wonpil about Brian, which is when they told him he had some family matters to settle. If he were to be honest, he didn’t like how Brian chose not to confide in him, but could go to Wonpil and Dowoon. Did he not trust him? Were they just not close enough? Jae feels jealousy build up in him, but quickly shakes his head to clear his mind and continues with his meal.

“Its fine, I’m good. He’ll text when he’s ready.” Jae says, almost as if to reassure himself too.

However, when Friday comes and there is still no news from Brian, Jae caves in. He sends a text to Brian, but not before reading it over again and again for a good 10 minutes wondering if it was really necessary.

Jae: hey brian! hope u’ve been well. was just dropping in to chck if ure still cmg for my gig this sunday? :)

Brian sees his phone light up and picks it offs the table. His face falls as he reads the text message and quickly shoves his phone into his back pocket. Dowoon, who was sitting opposite him, notices the shift in his mood and quirks his eyebrows at him. Brian brushes him off but Dowoon has had enough.

“Brian can you tell me what’s going on?” Dowoon huffs, but receives no response from Brian.

“I had to lie to Wonpil that you were really busy with your family for almost a week, can you at least me what’s wrong?” He prods.

“I’ll tell you soon Dowoon.” Brian smiles weakly at his friend.

Guilt is eating away at him. Normally, he would have spilled it all out to Dowoon on the first day. However, he has been keeping it a secret to respect Jae’s privacy. There is a reason Jae is hiding his relationship from him so he felt it wasn’t in his place to spread it to others, especially since he wasn’t even supposed to know in the first place. So, instead of confiding in a friend, he has turned to partying every night, which is totally unlike him since he hates parties. He also choses to hang out till the wee hours in the morning so that he would be so tired the moment he reaches home he could immediately pass out. This prevents him from staying up late and letting his thoughts run wild.

Dowoon’s brows are furrowed. “What? Why are you keeping it a secret Brian? Dude we’re best friends, you can tell me anything.” he says, softer this time.

Brian sighs in response. “It’s just Jae,” he begin.

“He has a girlfriend.”

“Oh. I’m so sorry.” Dowoon immediately reaches out to place a comforting hand on top of Brian’s.

“What? That’s not all. Wait wha- wait, why are you saying sorry?” Brian is taken aback by his apology and retracts his hand from under Dowoon’s.

“Huh? Oh but I thoug…” Dowoon struggles to form his sentence.

“That’s not all. Jae is hiding his relationship from me. I’m not upset that he’s hiding it cos i know he likes his privacy, but I also can’t tell why I am upset.” Brian lets out.

“Well, if it’s not about him hiding it then it is about him having it.” Dowoon says matter-of-factly and leans back into his chair.

“Why would it bother me?” Dowoon could see the frustration in Brian.

“Brian… don’t you like Jae?” Dowoon almost whispers the last part of his sentence.

“No, no I don’t. We’re really close but we’re just friends.” Brian says defensively.

Dowoon sighs and leans in, speaking softly to his best friend. “C’mon Brian, you can’t tell me you don’t see it. Even Wonpil and Sungjin sees it and we even have a group chat just talking about the both of you.” He chuckles lightly before continuing. “Friends don’t get affected by each other’s dating status, let alone sulk about it for a week. Look I know you’re not that dense, I’ve seen you have crushes before. I just don’t get why you chose to hide away from this one.”

Brian hates Dowoon. He hates how he can’t lie to him and how easily he sees through him. Dowoon was right. Brian had noticed how there was a shift in his perception of Jae. He noticed how his knees get weak whenever Jae calls him by the nickname “Bri”, or how he gets the tingles every time their hands touch. He noticed how Jae is the first and last thing on his mind everyday and how his heart literally melts into a puddle when he sees his smile. He also noticed how the sinking feeling he had when he saw Jae with that girl in the train felt strikingly similar to what he felt when his ex dumped him 2 years ago.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Dowoon’s voice snaps Brian back into reality.

There is a long pause where Brian thinks about everything that went on in his mind for the past minute. “What is there to say? My crush has a girlfriend.” He chuckles dryly. This is the first time Brian is admitting to himself, and to someone, that he likes Jae.

The truth is, Brian had an inkling that his feelings for Jae were not platonic a long time ago. He just refused to face it. How can he have feelings for his best friend? Everyone knows that’s the #1 thing to not do with your best friend because it almost never ends well. So, he resorts to ignoring it and lying to himself that it does not exist. He pretends that his flushed cheeks was from the weather and not Jae’s good morning text. He pretends that the smile he had when Wonpil teased him about Jae was because Wonpil was being cheeky, not because he was shy. He keeps running away from the truth, lying to himself over and over again hoping that one day his feelings would magically disappear. After months of cowering away from himself, he finally accepts his fate. He feels the walls he had built around his heart crashing down into smithereens as he takes a sip from him now room temperature Americano.

“You should talk to Jae, you know. You don’t have to tell him how you feel but maybe just tell him what you saw?” Brian nods solemnly in response and decides to pick up his phone to reply to Jae.

KingKang: Yeah! See you Sunday.

“I’m always here okay? Stop going to parties to distract yourself please, come crash at mine and play mario kart instead.” Dowoon laughs and tries to lighten the mood.

Sunday rolls around slower than what Brian would’ve anticipated. The four boys- Brian, Dowoon, Wonpil and Sungjin, were already at the bar Jae and his band were playing at. They were all seated round a table at the far corner of the bar, happily chatting away with their drinks in hand, waiting for Jae to come up.

“So Brian, is everything in your family okay now?” Wonpil asks. Brian is caught off guard and he take a few moments to think of an answer.

“Hopefully it will be soon.” He smiles gently. “I’m fine though, guys, it’s nothing serious so please don’t worry about me.” He adds, feeling slightly guilty for making his friends worry.

As soon as the topic changes, Brian’s mind drifts away to the conversation he is about to have with Jae in a few hours time. He feels nervous and dread. Sure, he knows the girl he saw is his girlfriend. But somehow having to hear Jae confirm it will only break his heart even more, and he knows it. How is he even going to bring the topic up? “Hey Jae, I caught you going out on your secret date”? Or “Jae I know what you are hiding from me”? Brian’s knee could not stop bouncing and his eyes dart around the room, looking for nothing in particular. He lifts his hand and brings the glass to his lips to gulp down the remaining liquid in the cup before signalling to the bartender for a refill. The rest of the boys noticed how fast he was downing the alcohol, but chose not to interfere, not knowing exactly what he had went through the past week.

Finally, it was Jae’s turn under the spotlight. By now, Brian already has a significant amount of alcohol in his system. He watches as Jae gets on stage and sings his heart out, voice as sweet as honey. Gosh, how much he misses hearing that voice everyday. He admires Jae under the harsh stage lights, watching his every move and wondering how he still could look so good despite his sweat making his hair stick to his temples. Did he just get more good looking over the past week? Brian thinks. He looks at Jae and slowly his mind starts drifting. He wonders if anything would’ve been different had he known of Jae’s relationship. Would he still have fallen for him? Would he still end up sitting here today, having to prepare his heart to get broken by the one who stole it? Brian chuckles dryly at the thought. Why did he chose to hide it from me? He knew Jae was a private person, but did Brian not deserve to know? Did he not trust me? Did he think I was going to judge his relationship? Many questions are piling up in Brian mind and they were screaming for answers. He is spiralling again and his head was about to explode. He turns his head and his eyes land on Sungjin, who is seated right beside him.

“Sungjin.” Brian he breathes out. His voice is only audible to him and Sungjin thanks to the blaring speakers placed right by their table. Sungjin tilts his head in response, but his eyes were still focused on his best friend on stage.

“Why did Jae not tell me about his relationship?” Brian asks. Sungjin is dumbfounded and he directs his full attention to Brian.

“Sorry, what?”

“I know Jae has a girlfriend. I saw them together on the train home from work. You don’t have to lie to me. I’m not angry, I just want to know why he chose not to tell me.” Brian voice is void of any emotion and he is trying his best to keep himself together.

“Brian… I don’t know what you’re talking about. Jae doesn’t have a girlfriend.” Sungjin replies slowly, confusion written all over his face. Brian’s eyebrows are furrowed now.

“But I saw him? He was on the train with this girl with long black hair and they kissed, right in front of me….?” Brian trails off as he begins to doubt what he saw that day. He slumps into the seat and his mind is going into overdrive.

Sungjin notices Brian’s demeanour and places a hand on his arm as he replies, ”Brian, I don’t know who you saw but that wasn’t Jae, trust me. If Jae was in a relationship he’d tell me, and you. You’d know too, yeah? He won’t hide it from you.” He reassures.

Just then, Jae and his band had ended their last song and were now saying their “thank you”s to the audience.

Brian finally relaxes his body as he processes the information. Had he really mistaken someone else for Jae? He replays the scene in his head for the thousandth time seeing if he could spot something that could point to him it wasn’t Jae. And then it hits him. Jae should have been wearing the navy hoodie he had borrowed from Brian since he slept over the night before. But, the guy he saw on the train was wearing a yellow sweatshirt and even had a cap on. Brian can’t help but laugh at himself. He had put himself through a week of heartache and emotional turmoil for nothing. Jae does not have a girlfriend and Jae was not hiding anything from him. He stares blankly into space, unable to believe the turn of events when he feels someone nudge him. He looks up and sees the boys getting up, presumably to find Jae at the front of the stage. He follows them and gets up from the table, but quickly slips away without anyone noticing to flag a cab home. He feels his world spinning, but he doesn’t know if it is because of the alcohol or because of Jae. All he knows is that he wanted to go home.

An hour after reaching home, Brian hears a knock on his door. He opens it to see Dowoon standing there with a bag of fried chicken in his hand.

“What are you doing here?” Brian asks lifelessly.

“What do you mean, Brian. You left without saying anything and you won’t even respond to my texts.” Dowoon says slightly annoyed. “Anyways, I asked Sungjin what y’all talked about at the table.” He continues as he steps past Brian and into his house. “How do you feel?”

“Well, he doesn’t have a girlfriend, so that good. But why am I still not happy?” Brian almost whispers the last sentence as he shuts his door and joins Dowoon at his table.

Dowoon gives him a sympathetic smile. He knows the answer to the question, and he knows his best friend knows it too. Maybe it still for hurts him to admit it now, but once his thoughts has settled, he’ll realise it is because his feelings for Jae still remains.

That night, after Dowoon had left Brian’s place, Brian picks up his phone and sees multiple missed calls and texts messages from the boys, but one stands out to him.

Jae: where’d u go? was hoping to see u tonight.

Jae: dowoon told me u rushed off after ur dad called. hope everything is ok. thanks for coming :)

Brian feels guilt swallowing him whole. He regrets leaving the bar early, but at the same time, he didn’t know if he could properly handle meeting Jae then.

KingKang: yeah, sorry i had to leave before seeing u. u played really well tonight!! i’ll see u soon.

As he lay in bed that night, he decides that in order for things to go back to the way they were before, he has to get over his stupid crush. He fears that one day Jae will find out about his feelings and feel uncomfortable. It is tearing him in two because he wants to be with him again and go back to being Jae and Brian so badly, but he knows that every minute he spends with him will only make his heart fall harder and harder. Which is why he makes up his mind that night, right before falling asleep, that he has to distance himself from Jae.


	3. Final Chapter

Two weeks has passed and both boys have yet to contact each other. Brian is still sticking to his plan of avoiding Jae. He had told Wonpil he won’t be working for the next few weeks and also does not meet the boys for their weekly hangouts. He only meets Dowoon separately and tells him to tell the boys that he will be back really soon, and not to worry about him. Brian feels extremely bad for lying to the people who care for him but in his mind, this is only temporary and once he is able to get over Jae, everything will go back to normal. This is all for better, he tells himself.

In order to past time, Brian has just been sleeping his days away. If he wasn’t sleeping, he was either eating or gaming with Dowoon. Thank the heavens that school has reopened so he could at least have something to keep his distracted. Unfortunately, despite all his attempts to divert his mind away from him, everything still takes him back to Jae. There are traces of Jae in every aspect of his life that he just couldn’t get rid off. He still smells him on his pillow and longs to hear his laughter at night. Whenever his phone buzzes, he can only remember how giggly he’d get when he sees his cheeky texts. Walking back home from school alone only reminds him of the times they used to walk down the same road after their study dates. It was as if the more Brian tried to rid his mind of Jae, the harder their memories are working to remind him of his absence.

Distancing himself from Jae had of course taken a toll on him. Jae was, after all, someone he holds close. Brian’s friends and classmates had started noticing the sudden change in his character. He was no longer the outgoing and happy go lucky guy that everyone was familiar with. He became reserved, he smiled less with friends and held his head low in the hallways.

Jae on the other hand has not been doing very well either. He can’t help but feel left in the dark by Brian. Brian didn’t even bother texting him himself to tell him about whatever issues he had, and Jae had to hear it from Dowoon instead. As much as Jae was trying to be respectful and give him the space he needed, he just couldn’t understand why Brian would cut off all contact with him. No good morning texts, no “what r u doing today”. Not even an update to tell him he how he has been. It was radio silence from Brian. It was hard to admit it at first, but Jae was definitely hurt by this. It was as if there was a switch between them that was flicked and all of a sudden, they were back to being strangers again, even though the memories they had together still lived fresh in his mind.

In the beginning, Jae couldn’t help but ask himself if it was something he did wrong. He worried for Brian and wondered what could have happened at home that made him so withdrawn from his social life. However, after days dragged on to weeks, Jae’s worry turned into resentment. How could Brian go on for so long without reaching out to his best friend? Was he that unimportant and disposable to him? Now Jae is a mixed of hurt and anger, and choses not to reach out first because he did not want to seem like the “weaker” one, or the one who cared more in this friendship. Call it being petty, but to Jae this is his attempt at self preservation. If he gives in, he is admitting that he is more attached to Brian than he is to Jae, and if anything happens Jae would end up with the bigger wound than Brian. He is protecting his heart and minimising any potential damage on his side. Plus, if anything Brian should reach out first since he was the one who asked for space, right? Therefore, for the hundredth time that day, Jae is once again fighting off the urge to drop Brian a text or give him a call. He finally wills himself to click off his phone before he steps into the fast food chain that he has grown all too familiar with over the past few months.

He makes his way towards the counter and sees the waitress behind the cashier, who instantly recognises him too.

“Oh…hi… Brian said he was coming alone though…?” the waitress trails off as a look confusion is plastered on her face.

Jae tilts his head and doesn’t quite get what she was saying.

“Brian came in just a few minutes ago and said he was alone so we didn’t prepare you order…” She says as she points to the booth near the windows.

Jae turns and just as the the waitress said, there he was, seated at the seat they would normally sit at, looking out the windows waiting for his order to arrive, looking just as good as he always do. This is the first time Jae was seeing him in weeks and his heart clenched at the familiar sight. He looked exactly the same as he did almost a month ago, except there seems to be an air of gloominess surrounding him. Jae didn’t know if he is reading too much into it, but Brian’s back was slouched and there was a hint of sadness in his eyes as he watched the passerbys go about their day. Jae immediately feels selfish for getting mad that he didn’t text first. He clearly had his own set of problems to settle. Jae sighs and turns back towards the waitress and orders his food. After paying, he gathers all his courage and walks over to Brian’s table.

“Hey Brian,” he starts, opting not to use the nickname “bri” this time. “can I join you?”

Brian’s head immediately shoots up hearing the voice that he had been longing for the past weeks. He stares at Jae in disbelief for a fews seconds before recollecting himself and nodding his head. Jae takes a seat across him and his mind flashes back to when they would do this all the time. The tension is thick between them and every second of silence is breaking Jae’s heart into a million other pieces. This is not how a normal meal with Brian is like.

“Seems like they knew not to prepare my share this time.” Jae jokes as he points towards Brians food that was now on the table. It must’ve arrived when he was at the cashier, he thought.

Brian only chuckles in response. “Yeah, they kinda got the hang of it after the third time I came in here alone.”

Oh? Jae is taken aback by his bluntness. He didn’t think Brian would be addressing whatever that’s going on between them, at least not so soon. But heck, since he wants to talk about it, we shall, Jae thinks.

“What’s going on with you?” Jae asks. Brian looks up from his fries and pauses.

“I thought Dowoon told you? I have some family stuff to deal with.” He says, but his eyes never meet Jae’s.

“Yeah I know. I’m talking about you with me. Did I do something wrong? Why didn’t you text me?” Jae softens. Brian could see the vulnerability in his eyes and his heart shatters that very moment.

“What? no Jae, no. I’m just really tired… I… I’m not mad at you. I haven’t been keeping up with any other of my friends either. I will soon, give me some more time and let this blow over first yeah?” Brian answers.

“But Brian, I’m not just any other friend am I? Correct me if I am wrong but I thought we were like best friends? I mean, I don’t want to sound like a teenager here fretting over a best friend status but I do believe I am more than just a normal friend to you, so why are you treating me like one? I want to know what’s going on. I want you to confide in my and tell me your problems like you do with Dowoon. Why are you shunning me away?” Jae furrows his brows, voice laced with hurt and frustration.

Hearing this from Jae made Brian realise he had made a fatal mistake. He shouldn’t have blocked Jae out of his life, even though it may have sounded like an easy way out. Jae was his best friend before he was his crush. He can’t simply chose to leave his side one day just to get over his feelings. That was not up to him to decide, but up to the both of them. This is, and will always be, how relationships of any kind work. You seek the understanding of both parties and discuss the solution to a problem together. Brian deciding this all by himself basically disregarded Jae’s feelings. He didn’t consider how would Jae feel, or what he would rather do, and just went ahead with what he deemed was best.

Brian is silent. He can’t even look Jae in the eye and his mind is a mess of thoughts.

“Brian will you look at me?” Jae speaks again. “What is going on Brian?” He sighs exasperated and leans back into the booth.

Brian’s feels a pang in his heart when he notices Jae calling him by his full name and not “bri”.

“Jae, I- I’m so sorry you feel this way. There really is nothing to be mad at you about, you’re an amazing friend. And you’re right, you are my best friend and I do see you as one. I’m sorry I have been treating you like it. I don’t have any excuse for that. I guess I was just too caught up with whatever thats been going on and I lost sight with what is truly important. I’m sorry.” Brian finally says. He wasn’t lying. He did get too caught up with his feelings, with wanting things to go back to the way they were before that he forgot that the friendship they have now is one that is irreplaceable. How could he have been so careless with it?

Jae takes a deep breath. “Okay, thank you for that.”

Just then, the waiter arrives with Jae food, giving Jae some time to digest whatever he has just been told. The waiter sets the tray down in front of Jae and leaves the table, clearly sensing the tension.

“Can you tell me what is going on at home?” Jae asks quietly.

“I will tell you soon, is that okay?” Brian responds just as gently. He has never felt shittier about himself.

“Yeah, thats cool.” Jae says and smiles before taking a piece of fry and putting it in his mouth.

They stay silent for the rest of the meal, but the tension no longer haunts them. Jae is glad that things have been cleared and he is enjoying being able to sit and eat with Brian again. As they were getting up and leaving the diner, Brian asks Jae if he wanted to join him at the arcade. Jae grins and nods in response as he feels his stomach do the biggest somersault. They proceed to the arcade, where they slowly warmed up to each other and subsequently spent hours laughing and fooling around as if nothing ever happened.

That night, after both boys have headed home, Brian lies awake on his bed and pulls out his phone.

KingKang: Hope ure home safe, thank u for today.

He smiles as he hits send as its been awhile since they last texted. He also sends over the photos he took of Jae holding the plushie he won at the claw machine as well as some selfies they took from today, and spends the next few minutes staring at Jae beaming from ear to ear.

Jae: Glad ure home safe

Jae: wow i look stunning in those pics

Jae can’t help but feel a wave of warmth bubbling in him. He is relieved that they were able to find their way back to their original comfort and playfulness. He stares at Brian in the photos and his heart skips a beat looking at his smile. He clicks off him phone and slowly drifts to sleep, thinking of Brian, and how he is finally within reach again, and what it was like to finally feel his warmth again, to feel home at again.

Slowly but surely, things were starting to fall back into place. Both boys were back at the library corner for their study dates and were texting back and forth everyday too. Ever since that day, their moods have visibly gotten better, and were literally glowing everywhere they went. Brian was also slowly starting to pick up shifts at the yogurt store and Jae could finally find joy in going to work again. During the time Brian was away, the only other person he knew who worked there was Wonpil, and even though he was his friend, at work he was his boss. Today is one of the lucky days Jae and Brian have a closing shift together. They had just finished closing the store and Jae is in the back room packing up his things when Brian comes in holding two cups of yogurt.

“Care to join me?” The corner of his lips curl upwards as he hands one to Jae.

  
Jae heart is beating erratically against his chest as he notices the toppings Brian had chosen. They were the ones he always picked for himself since he was allergic to the rest of them. It is small, but it is details like this that made it impossible for his mind to stop dwelling on Brian. He extends his hand and accepts the cup as he looks up at Brian, into those rich brown eyes. Thankfully the room was dark, and Brian did not notice Jae’s eyes that are locked in a trance, so he left the room immediately after to wait for Jae at the table.

“My birthday is coming up.” Jae says all of a sudden, halfway through his cup of frozen yogurt.

“Dowoon’s comes first you know that right?” Brian side eyes him.

“How can I not, we’re literally celebrating it with him this weekend.” He says as he returns the side eye, before continuing. “Ijust wanted to remind you, in case you’re too caught up with Dowoon’s.” Jae joking says and exaggerates his shrug, earning himself a smack on the arm. Brian quickly diverts the topic before Jae has the chance to probe about his plans. He actually already has a whole day planned out for the both of them for Jae’s birthday, but he wants it to be as much of a surprise as it can be.

Time flies by exceptionally fast, with the help of the unending list of thesis and presentations that were bombarding the boys, keeping them fully occupied. This has to be the most hectic semester, at least for Jae, since it was his last semester here before he graduates. He has so much on his plate, he barely has time to squeeze in shifts at the store, let alone go for band practices. However in times like this, he is so grateful to have Brian around to lean on for support. Whenever he has to stay late at the library to revise his script for a presentation, Brian was there to stay with him. He sometimes even goes out to buy and sneak food back if he himself feels hungry. That day when Jae had to pull an all nighter to rush a report, Brian let him crash his dorm since it was right next to school, and was way more convenient for him. This was despite Brian having his own set of reports and exams to sit for the next day. He had sacrifice so much for Jae and shown so much understanding and patience towards him, to say Jae was thankful was an understatement.

Jae heaves a sigh of relief once he hits send on his email to his professor, submitting his final report for the week. The time was 9.43pm on a Thursday and both boys were the only few students left in the library scrambling to complete their work before the library closes at 10pm. 

“All done?” Brian asks as he looks up from his phone.

“Yeap, thanks for waiting, again.” Jae says shutting his laptop. “You don’t have to keep staying back with me you know? Especially since you’re already done with your work.” He gives Brian an apologetic smile.

“Its fine, I’ll be playing games on my phone whether i’m at home or with you here so it doesn’t really make a difference.” Brian shrugs. “C’mon let’s go.” He takes Jae’s files off the table and heads to the exit, waving goodbye to the librarian.

“It’s funny how you’re always taking care of me when I am the older one.” Jae says once he catches up, and takes his files off Brian’s hands. As he does so, his fingers graze past Brian’s and his skin tingles where he felt the contact. Brian feels the heat of a thousand suns burning on his face and the butterflies in his stomach awakens.

“That’s just cos you’re so busy now. Don’t think this is a permanent arrangement, Mr.Park.” He quickly plays it off and reminds himself to keep things platonic. He has been in this situation too many times now ever since he had made the decision to stay by Jae’s side.

Jae shrugs and doesn’t say a word, so Brian takes this opportunity to change the topic.

“Anyways, this Saturday you’re free right?” He asks.

“Gosh bri yes I’ve keep it free. Are you gonna ask me this everyday?” Jae chuckles and feigns annoyance. Brian only shrugs in response as he tries to contain his excitement for Sunday. Sunday was Jae’s birthday, and Brian has been planning for it since a month ago. He asked practically all his friends what they would like for their birthdays and took inspiration from all of their answers, in hopes to craft out a perfect birthday celebration. A perfect celebration for a perfect Jae, he thought.

Brian was pacing back and forth in his room, making sure he has everything ready for tomorrow. The day he had been meticulously planning for has finally arrived and he wants to make sure everything goes according to plan. He lifts his phone to check the time. 14 September 2359. He quickly launches his notes app, copies the birthday message for Jae he had prepared days in advance and goes over to his message app to paste it into the text box. He waits patiently for the clock to strike 12am before he hits send and smiles to himself knowing he most probably is the first person to wish Jae a Happy Birthday. He shortly reverts his attention back to the task at hand and double checks his bag and looks through his reservations for tomorrow again for the umpteenth time before deciding to head to bed. Although he only manages to fall asleep 2 hours later, after his mind got exhausted running through the plan for tomorrow over and over again.

The next day, Brian is rudely awakened by his alarm blaring through his phone speakers. For the first time ever though, he doesn’t hit snooze and instead immediately gets out of bed. He quickly washes up and is out the door within the next hour. He doesn’t meet Jae till 2pm since he wanted to spend the morning with his mum, so Brian still has roughly five hours to get everything ready.

The first task at hand is to buy the ingredients for the food he was bringing for the picnic later on. He makes a quick run to the grocery store and gets all the necessary ingredients before swiftly getting started. He bakes his famous mac and cheese as well as some simple chicken sandwich and salad on the side. Once that is done he packs them neatly into tupperwares and takes them with him as he leaves the house. The next thing on the list was to collect Jae’s birthday cake, as well as the picnic decor set. He makes his way to the subway station to begin his commute to the cake shop, earpiece on full blast as he tries to distract himself. He is so anxious. Anxious that something might slip up and ruin his flawless plan. Anxious that Jae would not like what he had planned for him. Anxious that Jae wouldn’t have fun on his special day. He knows he is overthinking it but he can’t help it. He also knows that he is spending too much time and effort for a birthday of someone that is just a friend, but he can’t help it. He taps his feet heavily on the floor as he waits for the subway to reach his destination.

“You didn’t tell me there is going to be so many things!!”

“What are you talking about Sungjin I’ve literally been texting you about this all week!! I said I’d be dropping by your place to leave the food, the cake and the decor!!” Brian defends.

“Yeah but I just didn’t think there would be THIS much stuff…” Sungjin scratches the back of his head.

Brian just sighs and plops down on the couch, finally able to catch his breath after spending half the day running around the neighbourhood.

“Well, just remember to bring ALL of this later for the surprise okay?” He nags.

“Yeah.”

“And don’t forget how I want the picnic to be decorated. I sent you the photo right? Make it looks exactly the same okay?” Brian continues.

“Yeahyeahyeah, the boys and I got it dude, don’t worry.” Sungjin reassures. “Shouldn’t you be meeting Jae now anyways?”

Brian looks at the watch on his wrist and curses. He is running 5 minutes late. Normally he wouldn’t panic. But today is Jae’s birthday, and he can’t be letting the birthday boy wait to start his celebration. He shoots up from the couch and rushes to the door, barely slipping on his converses before he is speed walking to the subway station again.

“Wowww birthday boy is looking real stunning today huh~” Brian teases as he sees Jae approaching him. By speed walking and running for the train, he was able to make it to the mall on time before Jae arrived.

“Shut up dude, you told me to dress up.” Jae may look annoyed on the outside, but he’d be lying through his teeth if he said his heart didn’t flutter. He arrived in a white shirt with a denim jacket pulled over, and black ripped jeans. It is simple, but Brian thought he’d never looked better.

“I know. You look good. C’mon lets go.” Brian walks ahead, leaving Jae behind to scream internally at the compliment.

“Where are we going?” Jae asks catching up with him once he has regained his composure.

“You’ll see.”

“What!! Just tell me bri.”

“Dude you’ll see in like 5 seconds.”

“Just tell me Brian Kang!!”

Silence.

"Bri!!!!"

“We’re here.”

Jae looks ahead. "The ice rink?"

"Yep." Brian beams.

"But... I can't skate though?” Jae says puzzled.

Brian whips his head around, mouth agape. “I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU COULD SKATE???” 

"I SAID I COULD SKATEBOARD, NOT SKATE." Both boys are in disbelief at the mix up and begin cracking up.

“The conversation was on skating, like rollerskating or iceskating!! Why would you bring up skateboarding???” Brian tries to piece his words together between laughs.

“I don’t know???? They’re kinda similar I guess???” Jae clutches his stomach and continues his laughing fit, breathless with tears in his eyes.

They decided to go ahead with the plan anyways since Brian had already booked the tickets. They quickly change out of their shoes and into the skates before hobbling into the ice rink, Jae desperately clinging onto Brian’s arm for dear life.

Jae’s hands never leave Brian’s for the next 30 minutes as Brian patiently guides Jae and teaches him the basics of balancing on skates. He is currently standing in front of his blonde friend, his fingers wrapped tightly round his palms. Brian has fantasied about holding Jae’s hands numerous times, but this is definitely not how he imagined he would eventually be holding them. He gently pulls Jae forward, prompting Jae to somehow figure out a way to move in the skates.

“Stop pulling me!!” Jae squeals.

“I literally have to or you’re never gonna learn how to move!!!” Brian retaliates.

Jae just grunts in response and shuffles both his feet back and forth trying to inch his way forward, too afraid to lift his leg off the ice.

“Don’t do that you’re gonna slip!” Brian warns.

“Then how am i supposed to move!” Jae is slightly frustrated at this point. He’s been at it for half an hour and he has only learnt how to stand up on the skates without falling. He shuffles his feet even faster in a fit of tantrum, impatient with his progress.

“Woah woah woah slow down Jae sto-“ Brian was too late. Just as he had predicted, Jae lost control of his feet and slipped on the ice. His body swung forward and he lands right into the arms of the boy infront of him.

It all happened in a split second. Brian hadn’t even realised he had caught his best friend in his arms till a few moments later. He mentally curses. This definitely wasn’t part of the plan. How is this in anyway keeping things platonic? 

Meanwhile, Jae is still buried in Brian’s arms. He had quite literally face planted into Brian's torso and the only thing separating him and his chest was a thin piece of fabric. He could distinctly hear Brian’s heart beat against his chest and feel the vibrations on his cheek. His hands were gripping onto Brian’s upper-arm and he could make out the bulge of his biceps. Jae freezes in his spot, his own heart pounding in his throat as his face heats up. This is so god damn cliche he is embarrassed he even let it happen.

Brian’s nudge breaks Jae out of his trance. He scrambles to his feet and struggles to find his voice, finally mumbling out a string of “I’m sorry”s. Brian ignores the way his heart swells at how cute a flustered Jae looks.

“You good?” He looks at Jae with a soft and concerned gaze.

Jae gives him a quick nod and lowers his head, knowing that if he looked at him any longer his knees would give way. He just needs to regain his composure and stop thinking about the warmth of Brian’s embrace.

“Take it easy okay? I’ll teach you,” Brian takes Jae’s hands, again. “place your feet in a V position.”

Jae obediently does as instructed, not wanting a repeat of just now. For the rest of their time in the rink, Jae’s mind is preoccupied with Brian. He tries to focus but all he could think about was Brian. Brian’s arms, Brians’s chest, Brian’s warmth. By some sort of miracle, he somehow still managed to learn how to skate, and was able to spend the last hour skating with Brian. The two boys were very playful, with Jae chasing Brian around and simultaneously stumbling about the rink.

By the time their duration in the rink was up, they were exhausted. Jae even had beads of sweat trickling down his temples. They took their time changing out of their skates and freshening up in the washroom before heading to their next location.

“Im starving” Jae whines and tugs on Brian’s arm. Brian can’t help but notice how adorable Jae’s eyes looked when he has his brows furrowed.

I know, if you could just wait…” Brian rolls his eyes almost flirtatiously and Jae’s heart jolts. Instead of returning a snarky remark like he normally would, he choses to stay silent, not trusting himself to speak.

They alighted a few bus stops later at the edge of a park. The sun was already setting by the time they arrived and the sky was dark with streaks of orange. They look ahead and the park is dimly lit, the street lamps doing little to light up the paths due to the thick foliage. Brian signals to Jae to follow him in but Jae grabs onto his arm.

“Why are we going into a park? Its so dark…. is there a cafe inside?” Jae’s eyes are slightly shaky. Brian just chuckles and slides Jae’s hand off his arm, grabbing his wrist instead and pulling him ahead anyways.

“It’s a surprise.” He teases.

Jae trudges along because he knows theres no use trying to pry it out of him. Meanwhile, Brian feels the knot in his gut beginning to grow. The plan was for Sungjin, Wonpil and Dowoon to head over to the park earlier to set up for the picnic and surprise. This is the second part of the birthday celebration and he really hopes it goes well. He was so worried earlier on he even stalled Jae for awhile at the mall so that the boys would have more time to prepare. Brian takes a quick glance again at his phone screen to check the time and prays that they were already prepared for their arrival.

Brian leads Jae pretty deep into the park, where there is only a few people left in sight. He makes one final turn and is greeted by an open field. Both boys’ eyes were immediately drawn to the righthand side of the field, where there was a red picnic mat set up with a few boxes of food laid out nicely. There was also six helium balloons that spelt out “HBD JAE” and fairy lights that surrounded the mat. Jae’s jaw drops. Before he could utter out a response, all three boys emerge from behind them and erupt into the loudest, most chaotic birthday song.

Their voices shocked Jae as he spun around on his heels, eyes wide open. He sees Sungjin in the middle holding a huge cake with candles, and the other two boys beside him with confetti poppers in their hands. As they sing the last line of the birthday song, Wonpil and Dowoon both pull their poppers and confetti shoots out, falling all over Jae. Everyone cheered and laughed and Jae just stood there, still in disbelief.

“What is this…” He says still confused.

“It’s your birthday surprise! Do you like it?” Brian replies as he shows him the picnic spread.

“Yea- I mean, how can I not!! Wh-who did this? whose idea was this?"

"Kang Bra did." Sungjin chimes in.

Jae's eyes meet Brian's. "So you planned everything too?"

"Well yea but the boys were really good sport. They did everything perfectly!" Brian's humbly explains.

"Awwww thanks so much bri." Jae coos and engulfs him into a hug. It wasn't a romantic hug, but more of one that's filled with gratitude. Brian sinks into the hug and unconciously tries to memorise the feeling of Jae pressed against his body. They let go and for a split second after, he admires Jae. He admires the few confetti strips that landed on Jae's head reflect the light from the orangey skies, making him look ethereal. He gently picks them off his hair and chuckles out "You're welcome."

All five boys settle down onto the mat and began digging into the food. Besides the food that Brian prepared, Sungjin, Wonpil and Dowoon also bought 2 whole pizzas and a bottle of wine, which they then poured into red plastic cups to drink out of. The rest of the night was spent with the five of them sitting on the field, under the moonlight, plastic cups in hand talking about literally anything and everything.

Jae is glowing. He's never looked more beautiful than today, Brian thinks. Seeing him today, surrounded by the people he loves and who loves him back, makes his heart warm. He realises that if Jae is happy and contented with his life now, there is really nothing more that he could ever ask for. Brian watches Jae as a laughter escapes his mouth for the hundredth time today. He turns and catches Brian looking at him.

“Yea?” He asks.

“Nothing.” Brian answers, and Jae just laughs.

“You enjoyed today?” Brian asks.

“Of course. Very much. All thanks to you bri.” Jae says, looking into his eyes. He sees thousands of glimmering stars looking back at him and can’t help but wonder if this means he feels the same too.

The fun filled days are short lived for all 5 boys as they revert back to the same old mundane routine soon enough. Wonpil is back at the store and the rest of the boys are back in campus attending lectures and finishing up group projects. While everyone is busy with their own lives, working to achieve their own goals, it is the small pockets of time they share with each other that gives them the push they need to keep going. 

Today is one of those days that Jae gets to share his time with Brian. He doesn’t have a shift at the store, but Brian does. So, he decided he would pick Brian up from the store once he finishes later at 6pm and grab dinner with him.

KingKang: hello good sir

KingKang: u done w ur report?

Jae sees the messages entering his screen and lights up.

Jae: actly yes

Jae: just did. finished it earlier than I thought

Jae: sending it over to my prof now

Jae: he btr give me an A I compliment his shirts all the time

KittyKang: sure… cos that’s what they grade u on….

Jae: if I wanted snarky replies I would be texting Sungjin not u

KittyKang: didn’t know I was so easily replaceable </3

Jae: ily2

Brian doesn’t reply and Jae just assumes he got busy with a customer. He resumes his initial task on hand, which is to send out his report to his professor.

“Ah fuck… what was his email again….?” Jae mumbles to himself.

He gives up racking his brain for it and decides to just search it up on the school portal. He types his university name into the google search bar and finds the link within seconds. Just as he was about to click on it, his eyes land on the link below it. “SJY University Confession Page” it reads. Jae just chuckles at it and continues on to his school portal. He knew the confession page existed ever since it was created a year ago, but he never got the hype about it and never actually entered the page before either. He copies the email on his professor’s profile page and pastes it into the recipient’s bar.

A weight is finally lifted off his shoulders once he hits send on his email. He starts packing up his things and closing his tabs on chrome when he sees the confession page link again. He contemplates. Part of him has always been curious about what secrets students were revealing on the website, but the other half of him is skeptical if any of it is even true. He decides to click on the link anyways, since he has some free time.

The webpage loads and he screen opens up to an interface that looks similar to Twitter and Facebook. Confessions were uploaded anonymously, and so were the comments made under them. Jae begins scrolling down the page. So far nothing seems to interest him. Most confessions were just talking about who the sender found attractive in campus or whether or not they should confess to their crush. However, a few scroll down, something caught Jae’s eye.

“Hey, does anyone know if Brian Kang from Business school is gay? Recently he has been hanging out a lot with this one dude (idk who he is tho lol, never seen him before). They would always go to the library or eat lunch together. Are they dating? I know he is popular so I don’t understand why he would even be gay. He can have so many girls. I am friends with Brian, but if he is gay, I don’t want to be friends with him anymore, so I need to know. ”

Jae is disgusted. Who is speculating such things about Brian? His looks over at the comments section and is shocked to see it has garnered over 300 comments. His heart sank knowing that so many people have seen this remark about Brian. He clicks on the comments section and begins reading.

“Omg ikr, I think they have something going on too”

“I heard they even work at some yogurt store part time. I think its weird but its also quite romantic.”

“Eh who cares, as long as Brian still comes to school so I can see his sexy face, I don’t care.”

“Ikr, he’s so popular, why would he go for some nerdy guy… zzz”

“I don’t think Brian would like us speculating about his love life”

“OHNO Brian is dating?? TT”

“I always see them at the back of the library studying together.”

“Yo I saw them that day at the ice rink. They were skating together and being all lovey dovey and chasing each other at the rink. I had to leave the rink or I would’ve puke LOL”

Jae immediately exited the page once he sees the last comment. A fond memory he thought he would be keeping for long time had just been tainted. Tears prick his eyes and he feels his breath get heavier. How could anyone even say such things about Brian? Who even were they to be commenting on what he does or who he is or isn’t dating? People are hating on him endlessly under this post and very soon the whole school will know about it and think he is gay. He is fuming at this point and has to holds back his tears that are threatening to fall. He has no time to cry. He has to quickly think of a way to fix this. He looks over at his wall clock and sees that it is 530pm, just nice for him to his leave house and pick Brian up from work. He rushes to grab his keys and wallet before scurrying out the door.

He spends the rest of the bus ride repressing his thoughts, which is usually how he copes with any bad news. He just doesn’t think about it.

Jae hears the jingle of the bells above him when he steps through the glass doors of the store. He watches Brian look up from behind the counter and crack the cutest smile. Jae loves his smile and the way his whisker dimples appears. He forces a smile in return.

“You’re on time!!” Brian says after coming out from the back room with his bag slung over his shoulder.

“Yeah I was hungry.” Jae lies.

They settled for a random Chinese restaurant nearby and begin to slowly stroll over. They had their meal in peace and everything was fine. That was until Brian decided to say something.

“Everything okay Jae? You seem a little off.” He pokes.

“Actually bri, I have something to tell you.” Jae’s heart is thumping so loud he swears Brian can hear it too. Brian just nods for him to proceed. Jae pulls up his phone and searches for the confession page. He scrolls down to that one post and hands the phone over to his friend.

“I know it hurts, but I still thought you had to know.” He says softly.

“Oh…. Yea I know about this.” Brian just shrugs and hands the phone back to Jae, who is dumbfounded.

“You knew?” Jae repeats.

“Yep, like last week? A close friend told me. But its whatever, don’t really care.” Brian says nonchalantly.

“What do you mean, bri, how can you say that! They’re saying you’re gay and dating me, and they’re being really mean about it in the comments. We have to fix this!!” He worries.

“I don’t see it as a problem. Can’t I be gay? Can’t I date you? I’d love to date you!” He lets the last sentence slip and catches himself too late. His heart stops. Did he just indirectly confessed to Jae? Fuck, fuck fuck fuck. His face heats up and he begins to panic internally. Jae also notices the last line and tenses up. However, he doesn’t quite know how to react to it or if Brian even meant it that way, so he just glosses over it instead. This conversation is more important right now.

“No bri its okay to be gay but don’t you care what others are saying? Some people are going to hate you for it! Bri, you still have a year more in this school, are you sure?” He searches Brian’s eyes.

Brian looks away and mentally heaves a sigh of relief when Jae doesn’t mention his slip up.

“Jae, I’m good, really. I don’t even care for being popular and you of all people should know it!! They can hate me if they want to. Its not like I can do anything about it anyways. What am I supposed to do? Stop being friends with you??” Brian laughs at himself.

Hearing this made Jae feel so secure. He knew their bond was tight, and that it is way stronger than some stranger’s comment on the internet. But still, knowing that that is never an option for Brian really reassured him and made his feel so at ease.

“I guess you’re right. But if it ever gets too much, please tell me. Ok?” Jae looks at Brian with worried eyes, to which he just chuckles and nods in response.

They quickly moved onto another topic after that, but the comment Brian made earlier still stuck with Jae, and he thought about it as he was lying in bed that night. What does he mean he would love to date me? Is it possible he feels the same way I do? Jae quickly shuts down the idea. How can the school’s most popular boy like a nerd like me? He chucks the thought aside and decides it was best to sleep on it.

Brian too is kept awake by the same thing. How could he have let it slip? There is no way Jae would be comfortable knowing his best friend has feelings for him. Does he know? Did he realise? Brian’s mind is wide awake thinking of all the possibilities. Sleep only catches up to him when his mind got tired of running in circles.

The next morning Brian wakes up to to multiple texts from Jae.

Jae: morning bri

Jae: wht time do ur classes end tdy?

Jae: wna talk to u bout ytd

Fuck. Brian’s heart immediately sinks. Thats it. Jae has figured it out. All those times Brian was being extra sweet to Jae, all those cute nicknames he used on him as a “joke”, Jae had put two and two together and he realised. He is now going to tell Brian that he is uncomfortable and that they should keep their distance from now on. Brian’s body goes numb as tears well up in his eyes.

Why did he have to say that sentence? Why did he have to dig his own grave like this? Things were going so well before this, he was hiding it so well. Brian’s vision is spinning and it feels like his world is crashing down onto him. He blinks away the tears in his eyes and types out a reply.

KittyKang: i only got one class today, ends at 1pm

Jae: cool, meet u at the usual burger place

Wow Jae, seriously? You’re going to “break up” with me at our favourite diners? Brian chuckles dryly at that. He continues to sit at the edge of his bed, staring into space as the tears are left to dry on his face. Not only is he going to lose his crush, he is also losing his best friend. He sits still, completely ignoring the grumbling of his stomach or the dryness in his mouth. He only got out of bed when he was almost late for class.

Class was torture to say the least. Brian was drowning in fear the whole 3 hours, dreading his impending doom. He obviously paid no attention to the lecturer at all. Only the thought of Jae was bouncing around in his skull.

“How was class today?” Jae asks once they were settled at their usual booth with their orders infront of them.

“It was okay, same old.” Brian lies. He actually hadn’t caught a single thing the lecturer said because he was too busy thinking about this conversation. He spent the whole lecture racking his brain figuring out what else could Jae want to talk about from yesterday, but nothing came to mind.

“Cool. Anyways I was gonna talk about yesterday, when we were talking about the whole confession page th-“

Ah fuck, it really is it. Brian mentally curses and quickly cuts Jae off. “Wait, um, I know what you’re gonna say.” He decides he couldn’t bear to hear those words come out of his best friend’s mouth.

“What?”

“I know what you’re going to say,” he takes a deep breath and continues. “I’ll just say it for you to save you the awkwardness, since it is my fault anyways.”

Jae has no idea where this is going, but he is also too curious to hear what Brian has to say to stop him.

“I know what I said yesterday was uncalled for. I was hoping you wouldn't catch on but i guess you did." He chuckles lightly. "I’ll give you the space you need from now on while I get over my feelings for you, but I just want to let you know it was never my intention to make you feel uneasy.” Brian pauses to look at Jae but he is silent and the expression on his face is unreadable, so he keeps going.

“I know I should’ve distanced myself way earlier but I thought I could handle it. I guess I couldn’t. You weren’t supposed to know and I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I’m sorry.” Brian’s voice cracks slightly as he utters out the last few words, but Jae doesn’t notice, too busy processing this conversation.

Jae cannot believe his ears. Is he hearing this right? Is he misinterpreting this? Is Brian, _the Brian Kang_ from Business school, his best friend, the man he has had the biggest crush on since the first few weeks of meeting him, confessing to him?

“Bri I… I don’t think…. I don’t think I’m quite getting it….” Jae spoke so softly, Brian isn’t even sure he heard him right.

Brian's face is now mirroring the expression of Jae's. His brain stutters for a moment. “What do you mean? I mean, you wer- this is what you were going to tell me, right?”

“Brian….are you telling me- is this a joke? Are you doing a dare or something?” Jae couldn’t even bring himself to say those words, that is how far off the idea is to him. He is not someone a guy as deserving as Brian would fall for, ever.

“Why are you asking this? Isn’t this what you want to talk about? Because I slipped up yesterday and said I wanted to date you, right? Is this not why we are here?” Brian’s eyes desperately searched Jae’s for an answer.

Jae’s mind screeches to a halt and his eyes are wide open. Brian looks away breaking their eye contact, hoping it would snap him out of whatever trance he is in. Obviously it didn’t work. He looks back and Jae is still carrying the same look of bewilderment.

“Jae….. please say something.”

“What were you implying? What do you mean when you said what you said just now and yesterday?” Jae responds finally. He wanted to be sure of Brian’s words. He had to, there is no way he would be able to handle the disappointment if it turns out he had misunderstood this whole thing.

“Answer me first, is this not why you called me out today?” Brian refuses to believe he misread the situation.

“No you answer me bri!!” Jae has never been this assertive.

“I’ don’t know what else you want me to say. I thought I was clear with what I said.”

“I know, but I just need to hear it to make sure I am understanding this.” Jae presses on.

“I don’t understand why you’re doing this. I know you don’t feel the same that’s why I’m apolog-“

“No one said I don’t feel the same!! I just want to make sure I’m hearing this right before I do or say anything else.” Jae is getting impatient as he cuts him off.

Silence.

“I’m saying I like you.” Brian finally lets out.

There is an explosion in Jae’s brain, but the good kind. He feels excitement running through his veins as he cracks the goofiest smile.“That’s great. I like you too.” Jae admits.

The world stops spinning for Brian. In that moment, it is just him and Jae, locking eyes in front of their long forgotten burgers, sitting in their favourite diner and confessing their feelings for each other. Brian’s mind is going into overdrive with all the possibilities unleashed the second Jae lets those few words fall from his lips.

“So where does this leave us?” He answers with the cheekiest smile.

“What do you want to do with this new information?” Jae returns the playfulness.

“Maybe we should date then. That is what people would normally do, right?” 

“Maybe we should. Should we consider this our first date?”

“Are you asking me out as the date is going in right now? This is new, I’ve never heard of anyone doing it like this before.” Both boys burst out laughing at Brian’s comment. They couldn’t stop smiling and giggling after that, barely able to focus on finishing their meal.

They left the diners later that day hands intertwined and hearts overflowing with happiness.

“I’ve been wanting to this for the longest time.” Jae whispers just loud enough for Brian to hear as they walked down the street.

“So have I.” Brian admits as he pulls him closer.

“Wait wait wait wait wait!!!! So you accidentally confessed because you thought Jae had found out?? But he actually hadn’t???” Dowoon’s look of confusion sent the room bursting out into fits of laughters. All five boys are gathered in the living room of Wonpil's apartment. They had already met up that week, but Jae and Brian insisted they meet again because they were so excited to reveal their relationship to them. So here they are, all huddled together on the floor at 1am, a couple of soju bottles shared between the five of them.

“Yeah, pretty much” Brian sheepishly admits.

“Hold on, but Jae, if you weren’t going to talk about that then what did you want to talk about?” Sungjin asks.

“I was just going to suggest reporting that confession for malicious content!! I was reading the terms and conditions of the confession page and saw that you could send in a request to get confessions taken down.” Everyone practically facepalms at his answer as they crack up for the hundredth time that night.

Amidst the laughters, Brian turns to look at Jae, who is seated by his side. Jae’s smile will always be one of his favourite things in the world. He leans his head onto his chest and hears the rumbles as Jae laughs along to something Wonpil said. Never in his life has he felt this happy, this loved and this safe. Ever since Brian was 13, he never had a stable place to call home. Because he lived abroad and away from his family, he was always shifting from dorm to dorm and was never able to settle down. Now, finally, after years of searching and longing, Brian has found his home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end!!! yay thank you to every single one of yall who read this <3 once again imma say that its my first ever fic so im sorry if this isnt really good, or if theres many mistakes here and there. I just really wanted to try out writing as a way to express my creativity so here i am hehe. 
> 
> Kudos and comments r greatly appreciated!!! Once again thank you for dropping by and i hope this fic made you feel smile/laugh in someway~ Stay happy and healthy,, and WEAR A MASK!!

**Author's Note:**

> kudos, comments, or any other form of support is greatly appreciated thank you !!


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